Real Image of T4 bacteriophage (a virus) via electron microscope.
jedisamurai-deactivated20130131 said: Ive seen alot of subs on this site and many of them.talk about being trained by their doms.. what was you're training like. you seem so confident in you're submission that he must have done a good job
Thank you.. I appreciate that you see me as well-trained. The thing is, ‘training’ is really just a fancy word for 'teaching her to be how I need her to be.' I was already confident. You have to be. Everyone has insecurities and doubts, and there’s no question that pleasing your partner and hearing ‘you did well’ or ‘good girl’ (uuunffff!) is a confidence booster. But if a submissive derives all of her self-worth from whether or not she’s pleasing to her Dominant, I think that’s a recipe for disaster. What happens if you break up? If he leaves, what do you have left? Where does your strength come from? You have to have some of your own to give to him in the first place. My ‘training’ is 100% dependent on the needs of both my partner and myself. What we want out of the relationship needs to align.
That said, once likes, dislikes, boundaries, limits, etc. are discussed and determined, what he wants and expects - whatever that may be - is enforced. And how it’s enforced is largely dependent on the likes, dislikes, boundaries… Do you see where I’m going with this??
Regardless of the what and the how, one thing is FACT.
Consistency is key.
If the expectation is that my bathroom is straightened up before I go to bed every night (haha!), you have a partnership with two distinct jobs. My job is to straighten up the bathroom. His job is to ensure that it was done. That may be a random ‘Text me a picture right now,’ or it may simply be ‘Did you do as you were told?’ If the answer is no, there had better be a damn good reason. (And reason should matter, it should be taken into consideration.) But if not, there has to be consequences. It has to be timely, and it has to happen. Or telling me to do it loses meaning. I falter in my obedience, and his domination… his leadership… is moot. The dynamic is shot.
I’m a give-an-inch, she’ll-take-a-fuckin’-mile kind of girl. One of my big things early on was blocking. The first time we were intimate, he moved quickly for me at one point and my knee shot up. In fairness, I kick box. It was reflexive. But it still landed my ass on the ground in less than two seconds, completely unable to breathe. And guess what? After that, if I even twitched it was over. So I learned to hold still (eventually… lol). I was trained to take, to accept, whatever he gave me, pleasure or pain. If he was inconsistent with how he handled me in that regard, it would have taken much longer than it did… and likely wouldn’t have happened at all.
Yes, he did a good job. For him. For what he wanted and needed from a submissive. The person I’ll be with next will likely have different wants and needs, so I’ll have to be ‘trained’ to meet his needs. Whatever they are. Whatever we agree upon.
I love this. I love that I finally looked through this blog ( on my computer, not iphone ) and sifted through links. This explains things to me and resonates, really resonates. Passing it along to R and hoping it explains to him as well. thank you so much subgirlygirl!!
This is so awesome… Thank YOU!
Sophie Dahl photographed by Nick Knight
“Issues I believed in were not being articulated in my professional work. Issues as simple as that fact that nobody was photographing women who looked like my wife” (whom Knight describes as “curvaceous” and “the most beautiful woman in the world”).
“Only people in their teens were being photographed — if you were older than 21 you didn’t have a look in. Lancôme dropped Isabella Rossellini when she turned 40: biggest mistake they ever made. All these examples were around me, and they didn’t sit well with me.”
- Nick Knight
This was an interesting and somewhat unusual scene for us. I suppose you could call it a “forced therapy spanking.” Snow was having a difficult day - she was sore from yoga, super grumpy, and a little depressed. After a few hours of continuous griping I tossed her over my lap and spanked her nice and pink over a constant stream of protests and assertions that this is not what she needed.
And yet, after deciding she had enough, I found her relaxed and smiley for the first time in the day - with only a twinge of resentment that I was right about this :)
Then we went for a nice walk and an impromptu dinner date - and the day was successfully saved and turned around. Doing something like this is risky and requires a very good rapport, but me and Snow know each other very well indeed.
Isn’t it lovely, knowing that the two of you are so close, so connected, that you know exactly what the other needs even if the other doesn’t even know it?
That right there is the beauty of D/s. It’s absolutely wonderful.I love this.
My gift to you tonight, Sir.
Use me for your pleasure.
I love you so much.
I love how he kisses her.
I DON’T CARE BECAUSE IT IS ONLY MY BUSINESS TO CARE ABOUT ONE AND ANOTHER.
This right here. Gpoy
Been guilty of that a few times. Recently. Blush.
If I don’t say it you’ll read on my face. Either way, I’m so busted.
Fuck him while he tells me dirty things.
Hmmm… I like this…
Straddling her, whispering dirty little things into her ear, while she grinds herself up and down my cock…
Lets do this!
Have I mentioned that words work on me? Now you know.
But… But… But… It’s not nice to tease!
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